over-bearing denial at best

so right now its denial at its worst.
i keep telling myself i can find something better,
that the sun DOES shine as bright somewhere else,
and that right now its all just stormy weather.
i want to Fall for someone as hard as i fell for you.
i can't have you, and i certainly don't WANT you,
but you have managed to bound me to this brick wall,
and i still never stop thinking about you.
What we had was nothing special,
it was never worth the front page news,
but the day it ended it felt like someone was squeezing my chest so tight that i could hardly breathe.
its not as though i CANT live without you.
i know for a fact that i can and WILL move on.
i have before, and i will again.
i just guess i hallucinated for a while.
and the substance, nay - drug i took is starting to wear off.
and i see it all for what it really is.
and just because i keep writing about you,
yes you know exactly who you are,
that doesn't mean i'm depressed and lonely and broken into a million tiny peices unable to be repaired.
no, you're merely a device thats good for inspiration.
or so the denial is letting me think.